Over the recent years many sweatshops have struggled to bring in the child labour and we’ve talked to major retailers to find out why.
“Well, they’re just moaning over nothing really. I’ve been to these sweatshops and I didn’t even feel hot, let alone building up a sweat. I don’t know what they’re complaining about.” – Topshop busybody Philip Green.
“Kids nowadays have no idea what hard work means, you know. When I was their age I had to make a pair of shoes before I’d even brushed my teeth, which was with a stick, by the way. These 5 year olds in poor countries don’t half complain; ‘ooh we want our mums, ooh we want food waaahh’. Honestly what babies” – TK MAXX CEO.
“We like to think we understand the youth of today and the ever-changing global market. That’s why we’ve stepped up. Now all people, not just adults, get benefits such as; smoke breaks, working toilets, only 10 hour shifts for kids and buildings that pass all safety tests! (Wink wink) – Primark CEO.
Camel Cigarettes has jumped at the opportunity, with machines set to be installed in every sweatshop from Europe to Vietnam. “Of course, cigarettes do cause cancer, but nobody’s told East Asian countries yet, so we are set to make a steal. Children will be the saving grace of the cigarette industry, thank god” – Joe Camel.
