Kim Kardashian Becomes Julian Assange’s Lawyer

In an unprecedented move Julian Assange has chosen – lawyer in training – Kim Kardashian to be his council.

When asked if there was any reasoning behind his bizarre decision he replied, “Well her dad got OJ Simpson off that murder charge and he definitely did that, so I’m hoping some of that intuition for law got passed down to Kim K. I’m fairly fucked either way so may as well try everything”.

Kim Kardashian’s team was unavailable for comment because she had to post something to Instagram or Snapchat. However a source close to Kim (It was Kanye) said “She’s such a fucking ho Lawyer, I love it”.

You have probably heard the news that we are banned from using Google ads. As our primary source of traffic this has been a devastating blow. Now more than ever we need your support. You can support The Bulls Nose on Patreon from as little as £1!